Category: Life
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Growing Pain
Growing up, ada sorang lady in my life ni yang selalu sangat cakap I bukan waris just because I’m a daughter instead of a son. It started lepas we all pindah Penang, when I was around 9 or 10. Before that, we lived in Tanjung Karang dekat family belah my mom, and I memang manja…
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Schadenfreude
If there’s one thing I wish I’d known when I was younger, it’s that not everyone is truly rooting for your success. Some think they are — but deep down, they find pleasure in seeing you go through a rough patch. I can’t pinpoint the exact moment I realised this, but it must’ve been sometime…
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My November
November felt like the month I finally did all the things I should’ve done ages ago… and somehow still managed to be dramatic about it. I Finally Went to Saloma Bridge Yes, finally. After years of seeing everyone’s photos glowing in neon lights while I quietly sat at home like a cavewoman… I finally went.…
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Thanks for the Silent Treatment—I Needed the Silence Anyway
I once got the silent treatment. Was it in 2018 or 2019? I honestly can’t remember anymore. And all because I chose to be firm. At that time, we were already struggling financially. Just enough to cover our commitments—barely a cent more. Then, during what was supposed to be routine maintenance, my house was damaged…
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I Wasn’t Allowed to Cry
I wasn’t allowed to cry. When I first saw my mom — Lifeless, lying in the emergency room — I cried softly and whispered, “Liya tak sempat jumpa mak.” But he said I shouldn’t cry. I couldn’t cry. If I did, it meant I was against God’s will. If I did, it meant I didn’t…
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When Silence Becomes the Strongest Answer
Have you ever encountered someone who is not a close family or friend, neither a client — who gets triggered if they can’t send you a private message, or if you don’t reply to them? I have. IT.WAS.NOT.PLEASANT. When I didn’t entertain her private message, she went the extra mile to get my attention in…
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Thank Yous
These past weeks I’ve learnt something new: excessive thank yous. Here’s what happened. I was showered with thank yous — excessively so. At first, I was baffled, because I wasn’t doing anything for free, you see. I was simply doing my part, and apparently, that was “approved” by her. But the moment I veered away…
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The 45kg Me Didn’t Know How Lucky She Was
I caught my reflection in the mirror today and thought, “I wish I was 45kg again.” Actually, scratch that—these days I’d be grateful to just lose 5kg. And to think, there was a time I complained about being 45kg. I’d stand there, pinching my tummy, convinced my arms looked like drumsticks. I was so critical…
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When my mom passed away
From the first day, grief hadn’t even settled into my bones before I was told — no, pressed — to follow him to the ATM, to withdraw her money. My mom’s money. My deceased mom’s money. He made sure I was alone. He didn’t want anyone else to know. But fate spared me that day.…
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Trying to help my son navigate Silent Treatment
Here’s how I’m trying to help my son navigate this, to protect his emotional health, and preserve his self-worth. And at the same time to help him understand not to do this to others especially his future family. The cycle shall stop here. 1. Reassure my son: “You’ve Done Your Part” Since he’s already apologized…
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Aliyawanders 